Gratitude is the best attitude, here’s why!

Gratitude is the best attitude, but why is it so hard to see the forest for the trees sometimes? Want to be more mindful and thankful for all the things? Here’s how you can incorporate it into your daily habits and why it needs to be part of your plan and strategy.

You might have already tried this at a Christmas and Thanksgiving family function with no result, but that isn’t going to work. A true gratitude plan will fill your subconscious with positive emotions that will change your attitude, tone of your voice and even change your heart to be more about self-love and love to others. 

After a few months of research and adding certain habits into my routine (including downloading a gratitude app on my phone) I wanted to find out why a gratitude plan makes you happier, and so far there have been some positive results. 

Gratitude unshackles us from negative emotions

I recently read a book by Sonja Lyubomirsky, who is a leading positive psychology researcher and the author of several books on happiness. In her book The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want, she writes: “Gratitude is an antidote to negative emotions, a neutralizer of envy, hostility, worry, and irritation. It is savouring; it is not taking things for granted; it is present-oriented.” She believes that gratitude is a meta-strategy for health and well-being and that in her research she recommends gratitude as both a pathway to experiencing more positive emotions as well as a motivator for self-improvement.

Another psychology and neurologist, Antonia Damasia (Director of the BCI and Dornsife Neuroimaging Institute at University of Southern California and Professor of psychology and neurology) reinforces that gratitude creates generosity which in turn strengthens relationships, as we become a giver more than a receiver. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you give more gifts, but more that when you give, she explains it is called ‘the cycle of healthy social behaviour’. We, as a society, need to have healthy mental habits that fuel your heart with positive thoughts, and in return you give out positive emotions to others and create a ripple into the world. How many times have you put others first, and you get that feeling of hope and instant love? This is why we need to create more gratitude habits. 

Think of it as a tree, and this tree represents your emotions. Under the surface you are growing roots, all subjects of your emotions and memories. If you don’t water it, or don’t feed it, it will die. First the top half will show, which is energy you show to others, and then the roots will slowly deteriorate, this is your mental health. 

Like most emotions, if you fuel it with negative thoughts, you in return will receive negative emotions from the world. But if you ‘water’ it with happiness, affirmations and things that you love everyday, then your tree of life will continue to grow, and also feed the other trees around you. 

Here is another example

The A-R-T of Gratitude:

Author and leadership development speaker Charline E. Manual, says that if you break gratitude down into three parts A for Act, R for Release and T for Trust, you will approach gratitude from a perspective that it is a gift you give yourself and those whose lives are connected to yours. 

A is for Act.

Act as if you expect to discover something to be grateful for in everything that comes your way, as well as everything that seems to be complete. Because as you consciously practice this state of awareness, in time it will become a natural action and response toward the small stuff.

R is for Release.

Release the regrets and resentments that can easily build up inside, and block our ability to see the good in our lives. Regret and resentment are like viruses that can spread and thereby affect those aspects of our lives that are otherwise going well.

T is for Trust.

Trust in divine life, divine order, and a well-orchestrated divine plan for your life. Trust the highest part of your being to guide you into pathways that make for a life that you desire.

Trust that the challenges you face can and will be overcome in ways that are for your highest good.

Gratitudes’ benefits take time

It’s important to note that the mental health benefits of gratitude do not emerge immediately, but gradually accrue over time. From all the research, a lot are saying that it takes at least 12 weeks to fully understand the benefits. 

WHERE TO START?

Given the benefits of gratitude for your brain and health, it’s well worth taking the time to focus on cultivating this emotion and trait in your life. Try these practices:

• Keep a gratitude journal. Keep a small book on your bedside table and each evening write three things you were grateful for that day. You could also pop one in a desk drawer at work for a positive beginning to your working day. If you need some help to start you off Meredith Gaston’s bestselling book ‘The Art of Gratitude’ is brimming with ideas, prompts, exercises and inspirations to show you how to simply and joyously cultivate gratitude in your daily life.

Write things like this, I’m grateful for ______ today because ______.”

• Write a gratitude letter to a past mentor or teacher. It doesn’t matter if you are still in contact with the person you choose. Explain what they did, how it affected you, how you felt, and why it is so important to you still. You can save it or send it.
• Count how many things you can find to be grateful for in each room of your home. See just how many things your kitchen has (like ice, running water, a beautiful view, sharp knives, etc.) that you can celebrate.
• Listen to a guided gratitude meditation. You can find guided meditations on apps such as Insight Timer, Calm, and Ten Percent Happier or even on TikTok and Clubhouse. 
• Start business meetings with a “what went well” one-sentence reflection. When you prime your team by reviewing their recent accomplishments, it helps you to connect and keep going forward with enthusiasm.
• Start by thanking and pointing out compliments to your fellow peers, and thinking about why you are grateful for them. Not everyone is perfect, but think of the positive and not the negative. 
• Take a daily photo of something you are grateful for and post to Instagram or Facebook, tagging it with #thingsIamgratefulfor.
• Try a gratitude jar or tree. Take a decorative mason jar or a small wooden tree and place it somewhere you will see it every day, like the foyer or your kitchen counter. On a regular basis (daily or weekly) take a piece of paper and write something you are grateful for, then when you are feeling low, read your blessings to yourself.